(a.k.a The Devil's Dictionary, New Millennia Edition)

     
     

 

Word:  palm

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Cynical Definitions

n. A species of tree having several varieties, of which the familiar "itching palm" (Palma hominis) is most widely distributed and sedulously cultivated. This noble vegetable exudes a kind of invisible gum, which may be detected by applying to the bark a piece of gold or silver. The metal will adhere with remarkable tenacity. The fruit of the itching palm is so bitter and unsatisfying that a considerable percentage of it is sometimes given away in what are known as "benefactions."

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n. An utterly reliable and discreet bordello ably operated by Mother Thumb and her four daughters.

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