(a.k.a The Devil's Dictionary, New Millennia Edition)

      
     

 

Word:  distance

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Cynical Definitions

n. The only thing that the rich give to the poor to call theirs, and keep.

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Cynical Quotations

The man who says he is willing to meet you halfway is usually a poor judge of distance.

— Laurence J. Peter

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The shortest distance between two points is under construction.

— Noelie Altito

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