(a.k.a The Devil's Dictionary, New Millennia Edition)
Cynical Goodies
Cynical Definitions
v. A weakness, the symptoms of which are the temptation to deny oneself pleasure.
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v. When voting, the deliberate choice of remaining useless in a given situation.
Cynical Quotations
A total abstainer is one who abstains from everything but abstention, and especially from inactivity in the affairs of others.
— Ambrose Bierce